Laugh Tracks in the Dust: Milo’s Free Kitten Store

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“Milo’s Free Kitten Store. Urgent inventory closeout underway. Nice selection to choose from. Two yellow with white points. Two tiger-striped with white points. One gray with faint tiger-striping. Extended business hours until inventory is gone.”

I never in my life thought I’d have to write the above, but the Feline Gods have hexed Damphewmore Acres with a bountiful, unwanted litter of five kittens. Imagine my surprise a few days ago when I saw a cute little yellow kitten staring at me from a hole beneath my brooder house — which is right next to my dog kennels.

I’ve told my about the unfathomable “friend affair” my new Brittany pup recently struck up with a feral cat. Well, it turns out that the feral cat has five cute, furry reasons for hanging around the dog kennels and eating free dog food.

I have one problem. The mother cat is wild as a March hare. And, if I don’t figger out a way to catch the five kittens soon and find them homes, the kittens will be as wild and carefree as their mother. I imagine I’ll have to resort to using a live trap to catch the kittens.

I will say this about kittens. They are cute when they are little — wrestling with each other and climbing anything they can get their claws into. The only problem with kittens is that they all grow up to be adult cats.

So, the offer is open. Come catch yourself a free kitten.

***

My wise ol’ pappy, Czar E. Yield, always said eastern Kansans are never more than two weeks away from a drought in summer. This year is proving his wisdom. Two weeks ago when Nevah and I returned home from Tennessee, Chase county was a loblolly.

Well, we haven’t had a significant drop of rainfall since and the ground at Damphewmore Acres is now cracked wide open thirsting for a drink. I’ve spent most of this week both weeding and watering my gardens. Plus, the temperatures are in the upper 90s and the humidity is simply wilting. And, it’s not real summer yet.

However, one good thing is the harvest of garden peas wuz plentiful this year and we’ve been enjoying meals that include creamed new peas and potatoes. Yum!

***

The “70-something” annual Strong City Rodeo was a big success with all three performances enjoying good weather, good crowds, and good competition. The rodeo parade wuz huge, too.

One thing that dimmed the rodeo a bit this year wuz the absence of my friend “”Tex — The Junkman” from Lakewood, Colorado. In his youth, Tex worked for the Roberts family in Strong City — the founders of the rodeo. He faithfully returned for the rodeo every year to renew old acquaintances.

But this year Tex’s “cowboying” ways got him laid up so bad he couldn’t make the rodeo trip. Our mutual friend, Jay Esse, said Tex, who ain’t no spring chicken, got injured working with a couple of his horses. I don’t know how it happened, but Jay sez Tex is laid up with a broken foot, some broken ribs, and a concussion.

We missed Tex at the rodeo and hope he returns to good health and can attend the rodeo next year.

Hoping to brighten Tex’s day, our mutual friend Jay penned this poem about Tex’s accident:

 

I visited Tex in the hospital today.

He doesn’t like being there very much.

Tex tangled with a couple of his horses,

And they treated him pretty rough.

 

His body is getting slower and older,

But in his mind he must think he’s 22.

Thinking like that gets old men in trouble,

When we try to do things we used to do.

 

Tex’s dog wuz barking like crazy and going wild.

His missus ran to the window to see what was wrong.

Angels must have been watching over Tex

Because the dog knew something wasn’t right

When he saw Tex lying on the ground.

 

I’ve known Tex for 50 years or more.

He’s always been a guy who’s “cowboy tough.”

So, I know he’ll be healed up quickly,

And be out riding horses again soon enough.

***

I just about ended a new Bambi’s life almost before it got started. I wuz driving home from Cottonwood Falls when a doe jumped into the road ahead of me and a wobbly-legged, new-born fawn followed her. The fawn couldn’t have been more than an hour old. I almost didn’t get stopped in time. But I’m glad I did.

***

Idea for the week: Someone come up with a chigger repellant that works.

I need it badly. Get your wheat harvest safely done and I hope it’s a good ‘un. It wouldn’t hurt anything for the price to go up, to

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