I have a few ways to better your relationship with your partner. Relationships are hard and they take time and constant work. Try to make these ideas a habit for your relationship and you will be on a better path.
Friendship is a powerful thing when it comes to relationships. Being able to talk freely and honestly with your partner is important. Share your day with your partner. Let them know what angered you, what went well and what went wrong. Sometimes it is great to just get your problems off your chest. Make sure to thank them when they do something for you. For example, “Thank you for washing my car.”, “Thanks for taking out the trash.” We all get busy and forget to say thank you, I know I do sometimes; that is why it is very important.
Turn towards each other and by that I mean when you communicate. So for example, if I was to say, “I have to get up early tomorrow to finish getting ready for my presentation.” The turning toward response would be “what is your presentation about?” and the turning away response would be “This TV show is really good” and the turning against response would be “You don’t expect me to get up with you?” Do you see the difference? By doing this, this will grow your friendship as a couple too.
Lastly, there will be conflict. You are two different people with two different opinions. To manage conflict between you, don’t bring up past arguments, let yourself cool down sometimes, walk way and come back to the conversation, use I statements, listen to your partner, and try to come to a conclusion together.
These might seem like obvious tips, but when you actually think about them, how often do you do them? I know I catch myself not doing them all the time. If you can work on these every day, your relationship with your partner will over time become stronger.
K-State Research and Extension, Harvey County
Courthouse, PO Box 583, Newton, KS 67114-0583