Dinosaur steak vs beef steak

Laugh Tracks in the Dust

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The price and availability of various foodstuffs is newsworthy fodder these days. Inflation, and perhaps price gouging, is making all foodstuffs more expensive.
Parts of the food supply chain have been disrupted by drought, flood, fires, Covid hangover, labor shortages, shipping bottlenecks, bird flu, fuel, fertilizer and pesticide shortages — all pressuring higher food prices.
Plus, I read this morning that many food and beverage companies and restaurant chains have reported near-record quarterly earnings. That looks like opportunistic price gouging to me.
All this food discussion got me to thinking. The real value of foodstuffs is the nutrition they contain. I’m talking basic nutrition — protein, carbohydrates, vitamins, minerals, fats, amino acids, etc.
And, yet, nutritive content scarcely plays any role in foodstuff pricing. Price is determined mostly by quantity and availability. Seldom for nutrition.
Which brings me to this question: From a nutrition standpoint, I wonder how much basic foods have changed since the days of early human evolution? I wonder if a thick, juicy, loin steak from some dinosaur was substantially different, nutrition wise, from a modern beef steak? I’d bet the answer is “not much.”
Does a modern fish seined from the ocean or line-caught in a Flint Hills pond, differ all that much, nutrition wise, from some prehistoric fish noodled by a Neanderthal? I’m guessing — about the same.
And, is a bushel of modern rice substantially better, nutrition wise, than a bushel of wild rice hand-gathered by a hungry early Hominid? Probably not much different. Same with nuts, fruits, and fresh greens.
How would a fresh dinosaur egg differ nutrition-wise from a fresh, hen, duck, or goose egg? Bet not much.
My point is that the “market” prices we pay for foodstuffs constantly yo-yo up and down, all-the-while virtually ignoring their rather-stable nutritive content.
Could it be that the “market” prices of foodstuffs should take into account nutrition? Just something to contemplate as you stand in the supermarket checkout line.
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Okay, enuf of this deep-thinking. Folks appreciate humor more than contemplating their belly-buttons. So, here we go:
A rural widow of several years decided to herself that it was time to get back into the elder-dating game. She was tired of the loneliness and wanted companionship. She decided that perhaps the best way to find her heart’s desire was by attending a selection of rural churches within driving distance.
So, she started out. Week after week, the new churches she visited were nice, but not inspiring, and the companionship outlook wuz dim.
But, finally, one Sunday morning, the rural church she attended looked promising on all accounts. She took particular notice of a number of attractive, graying, single gentlemen with tan marks across their foreheads — a good indication of time spent in the sun farming or ranching.
When it became time to pass the collection plate, the minister made an innovative announcement. “Anyone who puts a $50 bill in the plate has the opportunity to select a favorite three hymns,” he said.
Without hesitation, the eager widow was the first person to drop $50 into the collection plate. When the minister acknowledged that she was the winner, he asked her to name her favorite three hymns.
She stood up, pointed in three directions around the chapel, and declared, “I select him, and him, and him.”
***
After selling most of his beef herd because of the drought, a rancher poured out his sad tale to his banker. “I simply ran out of grass and water and that settled the deal. Can’t raise cattle without grass and water,” he explained.
But, then he went on, “But, I do have bad news and good news for you.”
His banker replied, “Well, spill it.”
The rancher swallowed hard and said, “First the bad news. After we settled up after the auction, I came up $100,000 short of paying off all the overdue notes you’re holding.”
“What possibly could be good news?” the banker replied sourly.
“Well, the good news is that I’ve decided to stick with you as a lender for at least another year,” the rancher brightly concluded.
***
Did you hear about the rancher who was so rich that he no longer branded his cattle? He takes them to his jeweler in town and has them engraved.
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Words of wisdom for the week: “A gossip talks about others. A bore talks about himself. A brilliant conversationalist talks about you.”
Have a good ‘un.

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