Roger's View from the Hills



Benjamin Disralei


Hello-Mr. Roger Reenger. This is Roger Ringer. Hello I am calling you to inform you that I am your personalized agent from the Publishers Clearing House. Have you heard of us?

Why yes, yes I have. I see you on TV, I get letters from you in the mail, I get emails. I know who you are.

Well that is great Mr. Reenger. This is Clem Smith badge number 4044 and I am informing you that you are our second Kansas prize winner. As second place you have won 2.5 million dollars and a Mercedes Benz car. Would you be home today about 2:30?

Why yes I will be here all day.

Wonderfull! Did you see the third prize winner last night on TV?

Well, no I didn’t.

Meester Ringer would you like to keep your winnings private? Or would you like the public presentation with the balloons and cameras so you can be on the television?

You bet, I want the whole world to know that I am a winner. By the way this is the fourth Mercedes Benz that I have supposedly won. The first three were never delivered.

Well sir I don’t know about that. Would you like a hard top or convertible? What color would you like? You have the choice of Red, black, white, or powder blue?

Make it a hard top and powder blue.

OK now I am going to give you your claim number. Now you are sure you are going to be home at 2:30?


Now you need to go to your Family Dollar, CVS Pharmacy, or Dollar General and by a $235 card made out to you.

WHAT! I knew it was too good to be true, you are a %$#@!^% scammer!

Nooooo! This is just an act of faith. It will not cost you anything you are using your money!

I argued for a while and hung up. You know it really makes me mad that these scammers who cannot even pronounce my name think I am dumb enough to go along. Well I did have his name, badge, and telephone number. I called the real Publishers Clearing House. They are not happy about people using their name to scam people. The operator, that could pronounce my name, asked if I would take time to let him fill out a report. People don’t usually have this much information even though his name and badge number were fake. But he did use a phone number. The report is supposedly turned over to the FTC and law enforcement. The man stated that the real Publishers Clearing House does not set up things by phone and never requires a winner to spend money.

So I spend the day thinking about what I could do with 2.5 million. At 2PM my phone rings.

Meester Reenger do you remember me calling you?

Yes, yes I do. Do you have your card bought?

You just come on by. I made a dispatcher and an officer laugh when I called and told them the story. If they are stupid enough to stop at 2:30, call us, we will be right down. You guessed it.

Was kind of cool to be a millionaire for a day.


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