Dawn Phelps
Columnist
Hollyhocks are presently blooming in our backyard. The blooms have almost reached the top of the stalks, reminding me of what a friend told me many years ago. She said that hollyhock blooms usually reach the top of the stalk about the time the wheat harvest is finished. So, every year, I pay attention, and she was right again this year!
But best of all, hollyhocks remind me of a huge patch of red hollyhocks in our backyard in Tennessee—they came up every year. In my younger years, while living on a farm, my sisters and I were free to safely explore our acreage, woods, and beyond. And we romped barefoot from early spring until fall, making memories that have lasted.
One of my favorite memories is of bumblebees and hollyhocks. Let me tell you how it worked. When the hollyhocks were in full bloom in our backyard, my sisters and I would pick off a big blossom, just the flower without a stem.
We would hold the blossom in one hand like a cup and face the hollyhock stalk with wide-open blooms, waiting for an unsuspecting bumblebee to arrive inside a flower to sample the sweet nectar.
When the bumblebee had settled himself inside the flower, we would quickly clamp the already-picked hollyhock over a blossom on the stalk with the bumblebee inside. Then we had to hold on tightly, really hold on to the two flowers with the trapped bee inside!
While we held on to the hollyhocks, the bumblebee inside became angry and buzzed and buzzed, louder and louder! We had trapped a bumblebee, and we were in charge of the show! Such fun it was—at first!
Then, in time, our arms became tired, the game grew old, but inside that hollyhock was a very angry bumblebee! Yes, the only downside to our game was we eventually had to let go, we had to turn loose!
Even though we had done the “bumblebee-hollyhock trick” before, it was always a temptation to do it again. But as a rule, the bumblebee won even though we had learned to run like crazy when we turned loose! But we usually got stung! The pain was excruciating with ensuing swelling, soreness, and itching to follow!
Looking back, I believe there are lessons I learned about bumblebees and hollyhocks which can be contrasted and compared to living life.
- As children we chose to play the bumblebee-and-hollyhocks game. With life, sometimes there are no choices in some situations. Sometimes, life just happens,” and we must deal with the fallout.
- Sometimes when playing with bumblebees and hollyhocks, we did not get stung. Many times, life brings us joy, and we can escape the pain, at least for a while.
- As a child, while hanging on to the hollyhocks, my arms became tired. Hanging on to the past, if the past has been unpleasant, can be wearisome and tiring.
- Whether hanging on to an angry bumblebee in two flowers or hanging on to the past, turning loose of either can be painful. Turning loose and moving on with life is not always easy.
- When holding on to a bumblebee, one must decide when to turn loose, and moving on is a conscious decision.
Even though “letting go” can be difficult and painful, whether it be turning loose of a bad relationship, a job, or making some other change in your life, you may have to turn loose of the “hollyhocks” to get “unstuck” and move around “the yard,” to explore life freely again.
But dare to kick off your shoes and feel the cool, green grass beneath your feet. Yes, sometimes you just have to let go!
