Amanda Miller
Columnist
Lettuce Eat Local
Every job has its perks and pitfalls.
When I cleaned at the college right down the road, I could walk to work; but also there were some clear downsides to cleaning the guys’ dorm. When I cashiered at Chipotle, I could make my lunch however I wanted it (which meant a giant bowl of guacamole and chicken every time); but also my whole being would be permeated with the smell of cooking food, which I oddly cannot stand being a person whose life somewhat revolves around cooking food. When I sliced meat and cheese at a deli counter, I could sample all sorts of different cheeses; but also I have been on much too familiar terms with lunchmeat roast beef to ever eat it again.
The perks of motherhood far surpass any of its pitfalls, although due to the extensive nature of both aspects, I won’t even begin to expound on them. It is enough to say it is the vocation I have always dreamed of, regardless of the messy moments.
Farming is the career Brian has always set his heart on, so while younger me didn’t know to hope to be a farmer’s wife, I can see it’s the life for me. Some of the perks are obvious: country living, “free” milk and meat! And some of the pitfalls are obvious: the work is never finished, everything smells like poo!
Many parts are double-sided, like being so connected to the seasons and crop outcomes; there are some unique tensions between the flexibility yet rigidity of farming schedule, and the security plus insecurity of farming assets.
A major aspect of farm-wifehood is that of time. Brian is literally always working — when friends talk about when their husbands are home on weekends, I have to wonder what that’s like. The way I know it’s a Saturday morning is that Brian makes coffee when he comes in from chores and before he goes out again; we really value the Sabbath and he doesn’t farm-farm on Sundays, but the cows don’t go to church and don’t care what day it is, and would still like to be fed and milked. (For example, today is Sunday, and between both milkings, calf chores, and sick cows, Brian will still work over eight hours — on his “day off.”) My brain can’t compute a 40-hour work week; during the summer, it’s not uncommon for his weeks to be more like 90-hour. Farming ain’t no 9 to 5.
The upside, however, besides the fact that Brian loves his work, is that this all happens essentially right outside our front door. In contrast to a “regular” job, farming both snatches all the time and yet is openhanded with it: often the kids and I can look out the window and see Brian working, or we can at least find him in a few minutes if we need to. Take Your Kid to Work Day happens in snippets of minutes and hours all the time, and the children “help” him bottlefeed newborn calves, push feed, or repair equipment all the time. He might not come in for meals for days on end, or he might read Benson six books after breakfast before they go out and run errands together for the rest of the morning.
One thing the two of us don’t have a lot of time for is dates. By the time he comes in, tired and stinky, it’s too late to feel like going out anywhere, not to mention figuring out what to do with the kids. I think we’ve had a grand total of two “actual” dates in the past two years. We could do better, in fact we should do better, but this is our current season of life for now, and it’s still a great one. We’ll all check fields together, or toodle around on the Can-Am together — just some of the perks of the job.
Good-For-Anytime Dates
Ah ha, we do have time to have a date! These little snacks are great to whip up and have on hand, with the perfect balance of sweet and salty (like any good date, right?). They seem fancy and upscale, yet require no dressing up or going out. I put this combination of flavors together in memory of the bacon-wrapped dates I had first in Spain, but those are best hot out of the skillet and I needed something that’s good to wait until Brian comes in. Good news, while Brian said these were delicious, the kids didn’t love them, so looks like these dates were just for us two after all.
Prep tips: dates might seem like an exotic ingredient, but they are really easy to find. Just make sure to remove any pits.
3 oz cream cheese, room temp
¼ cup finely chopped pecans
½ teaspoon smoked paprika
a dozen or so dates
2 slices bacon, cooked crispy and chopped
flaky salt
Stir together the cream cheese, pecans, and paprika. Slice the dates open if they aren’t already, just opening them enough to hold the filling, and then spoon in some of the cream. Top with the bacon and salt. Eat.
