Amanda Miller
Columnist
Lettuce Eat Local
It’s a good thing two-year-olds aren’t too picky.
Let me take that back; that is a ridiculous thing to say out loud. Have I ever met a child, when in the whirlwind of development happening during age two, that isn’t exceedingly picky? In my own home, I have been guilty of some of the most heinous of crimes: getting out the wrong color of cup, starting to peel the banana when I wasn’t supposed to this time, requesting something horrific like putting shoes on.
I should know better.
Yet with all of these strong (and strongly expressed) opinions, toddlers also have a huge and refreshing gamut of situations in which they truly could not care less. Your pants don’t match your shirt? They’re not calling you out. Didn’t get the bathroom cleaned before company came? Huh. Ten minutes late to the appointment? (Is that the same as eleventy-hundred hours?) Even if it’s their fault, they don’t mind.
Sometimes they don’t notice, sometimes they don’t have any opinion, and sometimes they don’t know there are other options to have opinions about.
It’s that last stance that I was grateful for in regards to Kiah’s birthday cake this weekend. I typically feel much more confident in making food that tastes good rather than food that looks good, and this poor cake was no exception.
To begin with, I decided on an oatmeal cake. If you read last week’s column, you know it was the perfect choice for Kiah; baked up, it was oaty, rich, and moist, with a dense yet tender crumb. Great qualities for eating, not great qualities for making a shaped cake. As I looked with chagrin at the mangled cake, barely a majority on the cooling rack with the hapless remainder left stuck in the bottom of the pan, I suddenly remembered with rueful hindsight that I had made an oatmeal cake for Benson’s third birthday with very similar results. I scraped and patted the pieces onto the cake to hopefully patch it a little as it cooled, trying to preserve the shape of the 2 and make something remotely frostable.
Then there was the frosting. With the cake in the shape/lack thereof it was in, it was going to be irresponsible to try and spread a standard frosting. I had already latched onto an idea of making a reduced-grape-juice and homemade cream cheese frosting, an attempt to achieve her favorite purple color without using food coloring. So I just plowed ahead, going for a thick yet pourable consistency. Again, I was actually quite happy with how it turned out in the flavor category, adding a little sugar, yogurt, and white vanilla; I’m not a frosting gal but mmm I cleaned out that bowl. Yet while it was a shade of purple, I’ve seen better.
That brings us to the decorations. After I schmeared the pale frosting on the crumbly cake, the kids went at it. Our decorative scheme was minimal, in keeping with the topping choices I gave them: purple sanding sugar and purple pearls (so much for no food coloring), cow sprinkles, and small plastic animal figures. The results looked like a two- and four-year-old were in charge, meaning it looked…
…“perfect.” In all honesty and enthusiasm, Benson gushed over how “it’s the perfect cake, Mommy!” Kiah could barely keep her fingers out of it, exclaiming, “ME birthday!” She doesn’t know enough to wish her cake looked better, and in this case, ignorance is bliss.
While not an ordinary birthday cake in both flavor and aesthetics, this purple oatmeal creation really did taste good. And to the people who mattered the most, I guess it even looked good.
Two Delicious Oatmeal Cake
A word from the wise — this is the kind of cake you are supposed to eat out of the pan. It’s traditionally served with a broiled coconut, brown sugar, cream topping; and I think a (non-grape-flavored) cream cheese frosting would also be really good, but honestly a little whipped cream is all it needs.
Prep tips: for good fall vibes, add some warm spices like cinnamon, ginger, and cardamom.
1 cup quick oats
1 ¼ cups boiling water
4 ounces butter or lard
1 cup brown sugar
¾ cup white sugar
2 eggs
good splash vanilla
1 ½ cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
Pour boiling water over oats and let set until cooled, 20 minutes or so.
Cream butter, sugars, eggs, and vanilla; then mix in remaining ingredients. Bake in a buttered 9×13” pan for about 35 minutes, or until edges are just pulling away from the sides of the pan. Let cool completely if frosting, but also very good hot.
