JUST A LITTLE LIGHT
By Dawn Phelps
Ray, Tom, Dick, and Harry’s Daddy
If you have been around Miltonvale for a few years, you may remember Tom’s daddy, H. Ray Phelps. He is the father of Tom (Thomas), Dick (Richard), and Harry—I’m married to Tom.
Ray and Wilburma, Tom’s parents, had quite a sense of humor to give Miltonvale their own Tom, Dick, and Harry—not many towns can boast that! The brothers get together in the morning for coffee and the afternoons for tea. I have occasionally joined them for tea and listened to them tell family stories, and we laugh.
You probably remember that Ray had a sense of humor. He was always laughing about something, and he had a big, kind heart. It was his practice to make sure that preachers in Miltonvale had a topcoat to wear to the cemetery for graveside services in the winter. Ray gave my late husband Ralph Thorn one of those coats.
Ray was a man who could work half of the night but did not like to get up early in the morning. He was also a man who made some memorable statements and left some humorous stories behind. (I’ll tell you his whistle story later in this article.)
One of his statements: “Once a man, twice a child.” As a funeral director he knew the reality of going to hospitals and nursing homes after someone died and finding that the older person had to wear adult diapers. Thus, “once a man, twice a child.”
- Ray was in a nursing home in Minneapolis for a while before he died. The boys told the story of a time that Ray mistakenly crawled into an empty bed across the hall from his room. When a caregiver reminded Ray that he was not in his own room, that his bed was across the hall, Ray replied, “Well, he wasn’t using it!”—a true statement.
If you have driven through Miltonvale before special events like the Lion’s Club pancake feed, you know about a metal sign that is placed in the middle of the street at Starr and Spruce to let people know about an event.
One Memorial Day, Ray and Wilburma were driving downtown Miltonvale for a veteran’s dinner at the hall a block east of the bank—the lumberyard owns the building now. There was a sign in the middle of the streets, and Ray hit the sign hard with his car, knocking the sign onto the curb.
Wilburma told him, “Ray, you hit that sign!” to which he replied, “They shouldn’t have a sign there anyway.”
Tom told me of a time when Ray and Wilburma were on Highway 24 and Ray was driving fast. They met a cop and when Ray saw that the cop was turning around to follow him, Ray hit the gas and sped up a bit. Wilburma had to talk him into slowing down. The cop caught up with him and pulled him over.
After looking at his driver’s license, the cop said, “Mr. Phelps, I’m going to have to give you a ticket.”
Ray answered, “Well, you better. You pulled me over.”
Another time when H. Ray was driving, he was stopped for not having a sticker on his car tag. Ray told the cop, “It’s right here in the glove box. You can put it in for me,” and the cop did.
Now for a story about a little red whistle. When Ray turned 80, he decided that older folks don’t get enough attention. So, he bought himself a red whistle to blow when he was out somewhere and needed some help, and he used it!
Once Ray was in a restaurant and needed more coffee. The waitress was busy talking to a young man who was probably her boyfriend. After waiting a bit, Ray blew his whistle, and he immediately got her attention. She came to his table, poured him some coffee, and told him, “If you need something, I’ll get it for you. Just please don’t blow that whistle again!”
Tom said that once when Ray was in Penny’s, no one would wait on him, so he blew his whistle and got some action there too. Tom is not sure if he took the whistle to the nursing home with him or not—we’ll never know. If he did, I’m sure he probably got what he needed.
So that’s my H. Ray story, including the story of the red whistle and more. Have a great week!
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