Lettuce Eat Local: an Xtra special recipe
Amanda Miller
Columnist
Lettuce Eat Local
Let’s pretend it was on purpose. I could have specifically bypassed it for multiple reasons: I thought maybe procrastinating would make it easier; or I wanted to skip it to see if anyone was paying attention; or I liked the idea of adding an extra, bonus recipe at the end.
Or should I say, an eXtra recipe…did you notice that I completely skipped writing about the letter X? And definitely not purposefully, even though the logic would be there if I had. I didn’t even notice my mistake until a friend mentioned it. I had gotten so distracted by the what-I-thought was such a timely focus on yogurt after teaching a class on it that I had gone straight to Y and was already brainstorming Z, without ever considering X.
There are, however, 26 letters in the alphabet, and ignoring one doesn’t mean it disappears. I was afraid I might forget a letter at some point in my journey through them, but I was so close to the end that I let down my guard. Kind of like the photo album I made last year, wherein I apparently got so distracted by November and the appearance and subsequent glut of pictures of our precious Kiah, that I completely missed making pages for September and October. Oops.
Fortunately, I can fix this alphabetical mistake a little less awkwardly — although finding an X to write a recipe on isn’t the easiest; the classic X is for Xylophone doesn’t work so well here. But we can go eXtracurricular, with a not-for-eating recipe featuring Xylitol: homemade toothpaste.
Like most words that begin this way, the x sounds like a z; don’t say “ks” or “ex” at the beginning of xylitol. It is a derivative of birch bark, and is often used as an alternative to sugar. While it tastes sweet, xylitol doesn’t cause blood sugar spikes and is less caloric, and instead of contributing to tooth issues, it may actually help protect against dental cavities. It’s quite commonly used in chewing gum, and can also be found in things like medications and oral hygiene products.
I haven’t used xylitol much in baking or as a sugar substitute, but my son goes through so much gum, I’m very glad if it can help his teeth instead of hurt them. Trust me, he needs all the help he can get; I would rather not discuss how many cavities he has. Kiah is an overachiever and is working on getting her last tooth or two; while she seems way too young to go to the dentist, I hear the earlier kids get teeth the worse they are likely to be, and Benson’s track record isn’t making me feel optimistic. I know bad teeth can be somewhat genetically predisposed, and while he skipped my brown eyes, he apparently inherited my teeth.
Fortunately, both kids also inherited my seemingly paradoxical love for good dental hygiene. I brush and floss multiple times a day, but even I can’t hold a candle to Benson’s and Kiah’s love for toothbrushes. They each have several brushes of their own, and you never know where you’ll find one or more lying about the house. (Toothbrushes, not kids.) Round-handled ones, suction-cup-base ones, battery-powered ones, you name it. It’s a battle every bedtime not to get them to brush their teeth but rather for Kiah not to freak out about needing to use everyone else’s toothbrushes.
I made homemade toothpaste before kids anyway, but especially since they don’t spit well, I didn’t want them ingesting commercial toothpaste.
Making toothpaste might seem really “eXtra,” but trust me, it’s so easy. Definitely easier than trying to safely get my kids out of the dental aisle without them grabbing handfuls of new toothbrushes.
Homemade Xylitol Toothpaste
I’m not a dentist, so of course I should include the disclaimer that I can’t technically vouch for this product’s effectiveness. But I checked with the hygienist and she said it was good stuff, and we sure like how it tastes and feels. I often add some bentonite clay to my mix, hence the grayish color, but that’s totally optional. I could barely get a picture because my kids kept trying to grab all the toothbrushes! We use this in the mornings and “regular” toothpaste at night.
Prep tips: the texture of this paste varies with the temperature — the coconut oil is more or less solid as it fluctuates.
⅓ cup baking soda
⅓ cup unrefined coconut oil
2 tablespoons xylitol, to taste
10 drops peppermint essential oil, to taste
Mix-smash all ingredients together until homogenous (I use a spoon and rubber spatula). Taste a smidge and adjust, remembering it’s not meant to be eaten but you do want it to be pleasantly minty and not off-puttingly bitter. Store in a tight-lidded container and use a small spoon to scoop out what you need to brush.
Gruesome aggie humor
At the Old Geezer Gang’s morning coffee gathering, the conversation topics entail the full gamut of “stuff” — from local history and events, to politics, to jokes, to pointed repartee, to discussions about our inevitable aches and pains, and even to our inevitable impending mortality.
Some of the jokes told are too risqué to repeat in my column. Others are gruesome, but still humorous. The following is one of those gruesomely humorous stories.
***
Back in the 1950s, an old tenant farmer went to his eternal reward. His bereaved widow did the best she could afford to make her deceased hubby presentable for the visitation and funeral — she purchased a new pair of overalls to dress him in and a pine coffin to bury him in.
During the evening visitation, the funeral director overheard the widow lamenting that she wished her hubby could have been buried in a nice suit, rather than overalls. So, with discretion he whispered in her ear “don’t worry about it. He’ll look nice tomorrow.”
So, the next day at the funeral, sure enuf, the old farmer lay resplendent in a fancy blue suit in his pine coffin. All the funeral attendees commented about how nice he looked in repose. And, that’s the way he went into the grave.
After the funeral, the widow sidled up to the funeral director and said, “I can’t thank you enough for all the cost and effort you must have gone to get the blue suit on my husband.”
The funeral director replied, “Oh, it wasn’t all that much trouble. I had a wealthy deceased in the back room dressed in the blue suit, and he has no family, and he is going to be cremated. So, I just switched heads.”
***
Chew on this: I read a story that claimed a dog’s life — even if that means joyfully and endlessly chasing squirrels or retrieving sticks — is more meaningful than a dog owner’s life. That claim comes from Mark Rowlands, a professor at the University of Miami.
He claims that, “A dog loves his life with everything he has because it is all he has.” It’s a philosophical message on how we humans can live a more fulfilling life inspired by the unselfish joy dogs experience — even in repetitive tasks such as chasing a ball. The lesson to be learned from dogs in the professor’s deep dive is the love of life and the action a dog experiences in his uncomplicated life.
The author interprets meaning in life as authentic happiness and that the lives of dogs are typically more meaningful and filled with more love than the lives of humans because they are not burdened by personal reflection, self-doubt, and have only one life to live.
I have no idea if the professor is correct that dogs love their lives more than people, but I will say that dogs are almost always happy and that’s not a bad way to be.
***
I never thought I’d see the day when eggs were so scarce and valuable that they’d be the target of thieves, but they are now. Police are scrambling to identify the thieves who poached about 100,000 organic eggs from a Pennsylvania egg producer. The current street value of the eggs wuz estimated at $40,000. Investigators say Pete & Gerry’s Organic Eggs was victimized when one of its distribution trailers was burglarized. Police are looking for the thieves who might be trying to fence 8,333 dozen eggs.
***
Speaking of the high price of eggs. Last week, I gave reasons why governmental “Aggie Executive Orders” won’t work to bring down egg prices. However, common sense inventions could help if they make hens more efficient when squeezing out an egg.
Faithful readers will recall that I long-ago I invented a device that does improve egg-laying efficiency. It’s called the Hi-Volt Egg-O-Matic and here’s how it works.
First off, a hen getting ready to lay an egg really is in no hurry to get her job done. After she selects a nest, she relaxes for a goodly time span, then the takes her own sweet time to gently squeeze her egg out, then she inefficiently wastes several minutes cackling about her achievement. All the while, she is preventing another hen from laying an egg in the same nest.
Well, the Hi-Volt Egg-O-Matic solves that problem once and for all. It’s a nest that is electrified in a manner that when a hen settles down to lay an egg, an electrified “comb-cap” descends upon her head and completes an electrical circuit.
In that brief moment, the electrified nest shocks the shell out of the hen and she leaves the nest, allowing another hen to follow her. I’ve pictured the Egg-O-Matic. I expect sales of it to increase dramatically immediately and help lower egg prices.
Popeye and Testosterone Replacement
A few (or more) years ago, Popeye the Sailor Man was an inspirational cartoon character. When needed, the superhero would quickly swallow some spinach and become strong, able to pack a punch that would defeat any evil villain.
Nowadays, TV and internet commercials are encouraging men to consider testosterone replacement as the way to become stronger. While they are quick to tout the benefits, the risks are important and should not be ignored.
Testosterone is the hormone in men that is produced from the testicles. It helps in sexual development in men, libido, erections, sperm production, muscle mass, and bone growth. It counteracts fat mass, stimulates red blood cell production, and plays a role in cognition and mood.
If a man has low testosterone (hypogonadism), determined by at least two early morning fasting blood draws, and they have symptoms of low testosterone, then it is reasonable to consider testosterone replacement therapy. Signs and symptoms of hypogonadism include low libido, decreased erections, loss of body hair, low bone mineral density, gynecomastia (breast development), and small testes.
Symptoms such as fatigue, depression, reduced muscle strength, increased fat mass, and low blood counts can be caused by a wide variety of factors, and should not be reasons alone to consider testosterone replacement.
The best way to increase one’s testosterone is through good old diet and exercise. Studies have shown exercise, strength training, and weight loss all help to increase testosterone levels, oftentimes more than testosterone replacement does. Fat produces a hormone called leptin, which counteracts testosterone. Thus, losing fat and gaining muscle naturally increase one’s testosterone. Meanwhile, a healthy diet and exercise often boost energy, mood, and overall health.
The most effective method for testosterone replacement is by injection. There are also topical gels and patches. Any over the counter supplement that claims to boost testosterone is misleading and unlikely to have any significant effect on testosterone levels.
Risks of testosterone replacement include prostate cancer, heart attacks, strokes, blood clots, acne, breast enlargement, sleep apnea, aggression, and can contribute to an enlarged prostate, which can cause urinary frequency or even urinary obstruction. While natural testosterone stimulates sperm production, testosterone replacement decreases sperm counts, decreases fertility, decreases testicular size, and decreases natural testosterone production.
Testosterone levels naturally decrease as men get older. While some may advertise testosterone as a “fountain of youth,” the benefits are limited in this scenario and the risks increase as men get older. Popeye had the right idea. Putting in the work, and eating some spinach, is likely the better long-term plan.
Andrew Ellsworth, MD. is part of The Prairie Doc® team of physicians and currently practices Family Medicine at Avera Medical Group in Brookings, South Dakota. Follow The Prairie Doc® at www.prairiedoc.org, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube and Threads. Prairie Doc Programming includes On Call with the Prairie Doc®, a medical Q&A show (most Thursdays at 7pm streaming on Facebook), 2 podcasts, and a Radio program (on SDPB), providing health information based on science, built on trust.
Horticulture 2025 Newsletter No. 02
1712 Claflin, 2021 Throckmorton Plant Science Center
Manhattan, KS 66506 (785) 532-6173
ANNOUNCEMENTS:
Final Countdown!
Horticulture Newsletter Needs Assessment
This is the final month for the Horticulture Newsletter feedback survey. Follow the link below to complete a brief survey. All responses are anonymous. Thank you!
Horticulture Newsletter Needs Assessment
K-State Garden Hour Wednesday, February 5, 2025 12:00 PM – 1:00 PM
Register to attend this free webinar here:
https://hnr.k-state.edu/extension/consumer-horticulture/garden-hour/
Drip irrigation is an effective, easy-to-install and widely available method for enhancing landscapes while conserving water. It delivers water directly to the root zone, achieving over 90% efficiency compared with 50-70% for traditional sprinklers. Join Gregg Eyestone, Riley County Horticulture Agent, to explore water conservation practices and learn more about the benefits of drip irrigation.
Garden Spotlight
In 2024 we began a new feature called the “Garden Spotlight”. We highlighted multiple Kansas gardeners sharing their creative strategies for successful gardening as well as what led them to become a gardener. We know how important it is to learn from each other’s experiences so we’d like to continue offering this feature in 2025. Please consider sharing your garden story with us.
Here’s what it takes:
Email [email protected] with the subject: Garden Spotlight to let us know you’d like to feature your garden in an upcoming newsletter
We will respond to you with a list of questions for you to answer at your convenience.
As we turn your responses into a newsletter story we will send more questions to you, as needed, for clarification.
We will ask for photos to include along with the story.
We will send a draft of the story to you for final approval prior to publishing.
Your story will be published in one of the newsletters bringing joy and motivation to all who read it.
VIDEO OF THE WEEK:
Sowing Success: Research-Based Gardening for Beginners
(K-State Garden Hour January, 2025)
Whether you are a new or experienced gardener our essential guide to growing vegetables is a useful resource.
GARDEN CALENDAR
Start seeds indoors: Cabbage, Broccoli, Cauliflower, Lettuce
Prune fruit trees between Mid-February through March
FRUIT
Planning on Planting Fruit Trees?
Fruit trees are susceptible to many diseases and pests. Take the time to do some planning and give your trees that best chance of success saving you time and money.
Fruit trees require plenty of space in full sun with well-drained soil. Some varieties of trees require multiple plants for pollination while others are self-fruitful.
Here is a guide from K-State Research and Extension for Planning your Fruit Garden.
Small- and Tree- Fruit Cultivars, is another great resource that provides information about types of fruits to consider including their harvest timing, size and pollination requirements.
FLOWERS
Sharing the Love – Valentine’s Day Flowers
If you’re like much of America, you’re preparing to either give or receive a bouquet of roses. Here are some care tips to get the longest-lasting arrangement.
Roses often come in a plastic sleeve which retains moisture. The sleeve should be removed after purchase.
Cut 1½ to 2 inches of each stem with a clean, sharp knife or flower snips. Uncut stems cannot efficiently absorb water needed by the flower to open fully. (Current research suggests that cutting stems under water is not necessary.)
Remove any leaves that will be underwater once stems are arranged in the vase.
Follow directions on flower food packet to mix the right amount of cold water to food ratio into the vase. Flowers need to be nourished. Professional flower food generally contains three ingredients:
Carbohydrate – (sugar) nutritional source
Acidifying agent – lowers the solution pH and improves water uptake
Microbiocides- reduces microbial growth
Arrange freshly cut stems into the vase.
Check the water level daily, repeat steps 2-5 every 2-3 days so flowers last as long as possible. Keep flowers away extreme cold, heat, direct sunlight and sources of ethylene gas (fruits and vegetables). (Irina Sheshukova)
DISEASES/PESTS
Fungus Gnats on Houseplants
Have you noticed tiny insects flying around your home or office? Fungus gnats are common household pests that are quite annoying. Here are some ways to keep them in check.
Water houseplants only as needed rather than on a regular schedule to avoid oversaturating plants and attracting fungus gnat.
Dump water out of the saucer once it drains so plants are not in standing water.
If fungus gnats are already present in your plants, allow the soil to dry at least through the upper three-inches.
For extreme cases, repot the plant in fresh soilless media. Remove as much soil as possible from the plant roots to eradicate the eggs and larvae of the gnats.
Scale Insects
Varying in size and host, scale insects cause damage by sucking sap from plants. Their damage is not restricted to just trees and shrubs. They can devastate crops of herbaceous ornamentals as well. The time for investigating plants for scale is here and early detection is the best way to prevent crop damage.
Many scale varieties have white, tan or brown shell-like coverings that are round or oval in shape. They can blend into the bark so close inspection is necessary. If signs of scale are found, a dormant oil can be used as long as the plant is in dormancy and the temperature is above 40 degrees F. Dormant oils are beneficial because they can combat a wide range of life stages for scale insects. They are less detrimental to beneficial insects because of the application timing and are less toxic than chemical controls. Read more about the use of dormant oils from K-State Extension Entomology.
Here are some resources to check out for more information about specific scale insect varieties and their hosts.
Euonymus Scale
Magnolia Scale
Pine Needle Scale
San Jose Scale
MISCELLANEOUS
Wildlife Management Podcast
Are you looking for a new podcast to follow? Are you wondering what to do about beavers, armadillos or moles?
K-State Research and Extension Specialists, Drew Ricketts and Joe Gerken, have a podcast and YouTube channel that provides Kansans with science-based wildlife management information. New timely recordings are added regularly and you can view the archive anytime.
KSRE Wildlife Management (YouTube Channel)
Fins, Fur and Feathers (Podcast)
QUESTION of the WEEK
Planting Spring-Flowering Bulbs…Still?
I have a bag of tulip and daffodil bulbs in my basement. I meant to plant them last fall but time got away from me. Should I plant them now or wait until next fall?
If the bulbs are still firm, they should be planted now to avoid rotting. They may not bloom this spring, but at least they weren’t wasted. Another option is to force the bulbs to bloom indoors.
Plant them in containers and keep them chilled for the required time which depends on the variety. Then move the containers to a bright room to promote blooming.
For those of you who did get your bulbs planted last fall here are some tips to get the most out of the bloom season.
Deadhead blooms as they fade to prevent seed development and allow bulbs to store more energy for future blooms.
Leaves should be left intact until they die back naturally to allow them to store energy in the bulb.
If leaves emerge from the soil early don’t be too concerned. When freezing temps return the leaves may develop some brown tips but the plants should be fine. If buds emerge you can cover them gently with mulch.
Contributors:
Cynthia Domenghini, Instructor and Horticulture Extension Specialist
Irina Sheshukova, Instructor and Floral Design Extension Specialist
Raymond Cloyd, Professor of Entomology (photos of scale)
Kansas Garden Guide
Division of Horticulture
1712 Claflin, 2021 Throckmorton
Manhattan, KS 66506
(785) 532-6173
For questions or further information, contact your local extension agency.
This newsletter is also available on the World Wide Web at:
http://hnr.k-state.edu/extension/info-center/newsletters/index.html
The web version includes color images that illustrate subjects discussed. To subscribe to this newsletter electronically, send an e-mail message to [email protected] listing your e-mail address in the message.
Brand names appearing in this newsletter are for product identification purposes only. No endorsement is intended, nor is criticism implied of similar products not mentioned.
K-State Research and Extension is committed to making its services, activities and programs accessible to all participants. If you have special requirements due to a physical, vision or hearing disability, or a dietary restriction please contact Extension Horticulture at (785) 532-6173.
Cynthia Domenghini, Ph.D.
Instructor; Horticulture Extension Specialist
Department of Horticulture and Natural Resources
Kansas State University
1712 Claflin Rd.
Manhattan, KS 66503
785-340-3013
[email protected]
