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Kansas Cowboy Poetry Contest Entries Are Open for 2024

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Manhattan, KS – Write, rhyme, ride, recite! It’s time to enter the 2024 Kansas Cowboy Poetry Contest. “Current and aspiring cowboy poets are invited to enter our regional contests where they can perform their original cowboy poems in person,” said poetry contest chair Ron Wilson of the Lazy T Ranch near Manhattan.

“We are also pleased to announce a new youth initiative in that American Royal Youth Rodeo participants will be able to enter our contest for free in 2024,” he said.
Regional contests will be held as follows: Friday, May 3, 7 p.m., Rollin ‘Red’ Vandever Memorial Park, home of the “Wilson County Old Iron Club,” 10392 Jade Road, Fredonia; and Friday, May 17, 6 p.m., Hays Public Library, 1205 Main Street, Hays.

Contestants can enter to perform at either location or at both. All ages are welcome. Those interested in competing can enter online at www.cowboypoetrycontest.com. Only the top qualifiers at each of the two regional contests advance to the finals which will be held at the Flint Hills Discovery Center in Manhattan on June 9. State champions at the finals will receive the Saddlejack Bradrick Award, the coveted Governor’s Buckle, discounts and gift certificates from leading western wear stores, free membership in the International Western Music Association-Kansas Chapter, and two tickets to the Symphony in the Flint Hills plus an opportunity to present their poems in the story circle after the symphony.

“We are mighty grateful to the sponsors who make this possible,” Wilson said. Sponsors include the Flint Hills Discovery Center Foundation, the Kansas Farm Bureau, the International Western Music Association-Kansas chapter and Western Wordsmiths chapter, the Hays Public Library, Symphony in the Flint Hills, Flint Hills Discovery Center, and western wear donors.

Contestants can enter online at www.cowboypoetrycontest.com . There are two categories: Serious poems or humorous poems. Contestants can recite a serious poem, humorous poem or both. Awards will be presented in both categories. Only the contestant’s original work is allowed. All poetry must be family-friendly. The finals will be held on Friday, June 7, 2024 at the Discovery Center at 7 p.m. on the night before the Symphony in the
Flint Hills.

There is no admission charge and the public is invited to attend all of these events. For more information or to enter a regional contest, go to www.cowboypoetrycontest.com .
State contest committee members include IWMA-Kansas President Martha Farrell, Andover; Orin Friesen, Benton; Jeff Davidson, Eureka; Brad Hamilton, Hoyt; and Ron Wilson, Manhattan.

Lettuce Eat Local: April Food’s Day

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Amanda Miller
Columnist
Lettuce Eat Local

I’ve tried all sorts of things over the years. Serving up bowls of frozen cereal for breakfast, dyeing a jug of milk green, making “cupcakes” that are actually meatloaf and mashed potatoes — April Fool’s is the day, and food is the game.
I like to play with my food anyway, so of course the first day of April with its long tradition of tomfoolery is the perfect annual excuse for some extra food fun. I do, however, hope others have been more successful than I in the four and a half centuries since the holiday’s instigation. Although it was originally a day to poke fun at those who forgot the calendar switched to the Gregorian method and had their new year’s day all mixed up, now anyone is fair game.
My “anyone” used to be my family and now is usually Brian, of course, but also Benson is old enough to be the brunt of a little trickery. Technically he already has been, as two years ago I made “fried eggs” out of spreading plain yogurt on a plate and topping it with apricot half “yolks” and chia seed “pepper.” From a distance it looked delightfully deceptive, and fortunately for me it tasted good enough that Benson enjoyed it with me even though Brian didn’t; with age and experience, I’ve learned to make my trickery still tasty since I’m always the one who ends up having to eat my jokes.
The most effectively I’ve made Brian an April Fool was when I used gelatin to firm up a cup of coffee. It looked exactly like the real thing (because it was, just with an extra ingredient)…until he picked up the mug for a sip. Tee hee. He refused to eat it, but I had planned for that and I love the texture of gelatin, so I fully enjoyed finishing both mugs. Win win!
Gelatin will feature in this year’s April 1st joke, but the joking part is that it isn’t a joke. I expect Brian to be on his guard, and I’ll try to act suspicious; suspicious enough that he’ll keep waiting for the punchline when there isn’t one. I’ll try to plate up some things instead of letting him serve himself, maybe put a covered dish on the table and pretend the lid is on for a reason. I’ll pretend I didn’t notice what day it was, and hit him with the surprise that oh look! the food is normal. (As normal as it ever is with me.)
To enhance the joke-no-joke aspect, I was thinking around for something that’s called what it isn’t. Popcorn shrimp was an idea, except I always think about how I want to make that literally sometime with popcorn and shrimp. Other options included Dutch baby, pigs in a blanket, monkey bread, toad in a hole.
Once I started looking for funny named food, the list kept growing. But then I saw grasshopper pie, and I knew I found a winner for all three of us. It sounds like a trick, so Brian will be apprehensive even though he knows what the dessert is supposed to be, until he realizes I didn’t actually toss in any arthropods: successful backwards joke. I can’t tell if Benson will be thrilled or uncertain about pie with grasshoppers in it, but either way, there won’t be any insects included in its preparation: successful child-safe joke. And I adore the combination of chocolate and mint, but wanted a healthier dessert right after Easter, so I’m doing that thing where I play with my food and don’t make it “normal”: haha successful forward joke on Brian since I’ll first pretend it’s a trick and then pretend it’s not when it kind of still is.

I’m not actually advocating throwing desserts in faces, just enjoying making another word joke by referencing slapstick comedy in my funny food. Up until right now, I didn’t know that grasshopper pie was associated with spring and Easter, so this recipe is perfect timing all around. It gets its name from the same-flavored Grasshopper cocktail, which got its name from its bright green color. There’s neither alcohol nor food coloring in my iteration of this pie, thanks to the sneaky spinach instead.
Prep tips: my mint plants are just springing up from the ground, so I’ll use what I can from them (it’ll even help with the green color) and supplement with the mint essential oil. Oreos are traditional to use for the crust, but I’ll be using an almond flour and cocoa version, so contact me if you want that recipe.

½ cup whole milk
1 tablespoon plain gelatin
3 cups ricotta or cottage cheese
1 cup plain thick yogurt
1-2 handfuls fresh spinach
½ cup white sugar
a couple drops of mint essential oil
1 baked chocolate crumb pie crust

Sprinkle gelatin over milk in a glass measuring cup. Let bloom/soften for a couple minutes, then microwave for 30 seconds and whisk until dissolved. Add to a blender along with the remaining ingredients (except crust) and process until smooth. Pour into prepared crust and refrigerate overnight, topping with whipped cream and shaved chocolate if desired. Serve with an aura of suspense.

Take My Advice (Best Of)

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lee pitts

I must look like I need some advice because I’ve been getting a lot of it lately. This cattle business is getting harder and harder to figure out. I can’t decide if I should be buying or selling.

I read all the livestock newspapers and they said prices were going up. Then I had my palm read and the palmist said, “Don’t believe anything you read.” The tax man said I shouldn’t sell because I haven’t owned the cattle long enough for long term profit. But the futures market made sure that there wasn’t any profit.

I sought advice from my accountant and he said to buy a better computer and use Quickbooks®. I paid $2,000 for a computer and it advised me, “A fool and his money are soon parted.”

I called up a stock broker, you know, the one who talks and everybody listens? I listened all right. He left me on hold from eight thirty till five thirty.

The weather man said , “Dry weather ahead” and we got three wet inches of “partly cloudy”.

The optimist said, “Cheer up, things could be worse,” and the pessimist said, “They soon will be.”

The banker suggested that I sell. So after much deliberation I decided the smart move would be to sell. So I did. Immediately after the auctioneer said “SOLD!” on my cattle the market immediately jumped five bucks.

The psychiatrist said, “There are two things you should never do alone, make love and sell cattle.” So my wife went with me to the auction for moral support and so I wouldn’t do anything foolish, like buy more cattle.

My wife suggested that we sit down way back in the shadows so no one would notice that she was the only female in the place. Half way through the proceedings the auctioneer made the comment that ‘It sure looked like a good time to buy some cattle. You can’t play the game if you aren’t holding some cards,” he commented.

Then my trucker came up and suggested that he needed a backhaul. So I figured that I might as well buy something.

Two friends, John and Jack, came up and sat right behind us. Every time that I would start to bid one of them would comment, “Those steers are too full,” or, ‘Those steers are not very green.” The wife sitting next to me had her adding machine working and she would chime in, “Too high.” It seemed every drive of cattle had something wrong with it.

I was getting frustrated and realized this was why most ranchers don’t go to the auction market to see their cattle sell. Then at last a load came in that everybody agreed was just right. “They sure are green,” said Jack. “They sure are empty,” said John. “They sure are cheap,” said my wife. I bid one time and the auctioneer hammered his gavel down. My trucker had himself a backhaul.

Then my wife advised me, “You idiot. You just bought back the cattle that we sent over here to sell.”

My mouth dropped open as I realized the possibility existed that she might be right. I tried to look nonchalant. “Yes, but they were green, empty and such a good buy. I couldn’t pass them up.”

I ended up taking a tongue lashing from the wife all the way home and got the silent treatment for a week afterwards. As my wonder horse Gentleman and I were admiring our newly-purchased, vaguely familiar set of calves the long-languishing cowboy poet in me screamed for all the world to hear…

The moral of this story is plain to see:

Take this advice from me,

Don’t take any, even if it’s free.

Lovina Shares Stories of Phone Call Adventures

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It’s Monday evening, and I wanted to get this column written tonight so I can get an earlier start with my work in the morning. 

It was a windy day with the temperature reaching sixty-six degrees. I hung all the laundry outside, and everything is dried, folded, and put away. Oh, how wonderful!

Sister Verena came here yesterday and spent the night. Tonight, her neighbor Mary came to take her home with her Gator. It was warm enough for that. Mary sure has been good with Verena. Good neighbors are precious! Times change and people are less dependent on each other and less neighborly. We are fortunate to have some good neighbors. Growing up, we knew all our neighbors. We would go there to use their phone if we needed to call someone. Now we have our own phone in an outbuilding. I still remember the first phone call I made. I don’t remember exactly how old I was, but I had to have been 13 or 14 when my mother thought it was safe for me to walk the half mile to our neighbors. I would walk past my aunt Salome and Uncle Elmer’s place, then past Grandpa and Grandma’s and Uncle Henry and Aunt Barbara’s places, a trip I made often for years after that. I remember my mother writing on a paper what I had to say. I was so nervous. The neighbor lady dialed the number for me on their rotary phone. I remember reading what it said on the paper so fast that I often wonder how it sounded to the friends I was leaving a message for from my parents. I imagine our neighbor lady also probably had to smile about it. If the first neighbor wasn’t home, we could walk a quarter mile farther to the next neighbor. We would put the coins by the phone for each call. Long distance calls were written on a tablet by the phone so we could be charged later when their bill came. I still remember having to wait on the phone, as the neighbors were all connected to the same line. I would pick up the phone and listen to see if it was quiet before dialing. Now on our home phones we have speed dialing and only need to push one or two buttons. All lines are separate as well. 

After we were married, we had neighbors across the road that would let us use their phone, but if they weren’t home, we had to walk over a half mile to the other neighbors. I remember well the time I had an appointment with the midwife and my driver didn’t show up. Plans were to drop my four children off at my parents’ house. After the driver didn’t show up, I put all four children in a little wagon and pulled it uphill to our neighbors a half mile from us. Our neighbor across the road wasn’t home at that time. I remember how tired I was by the time I was back home. I was almost full term with the next baby, so it felt harder to pull that wagon. We were grateful when the baby’s arrival time was closer and our neighbor put their cordless phone inside their grill outside their door, so if Joe had to call during the night hours he could without waking them up. 

On April 6, some of my family will come with me to the Plain and Simple Craft Show in Shipshewana from 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. I hope to see some readers there. The address is 345 South Van Buren Street, Shipshewana, Indiana 46565.

I wish all you readers a blessed Easter! How thankful we can be that Jesus died on the cross so our sins can be forgiven. He is risen! God’s blessings!

Dinner Sausage

1 pound ground pork sausage

1 small onion, chopped

1 (10 3/4-ounce) can cream of mushroom soup

1/2 cup milk

1 cup diced cheddar cheese

1 (8-ounce) package of noodles

Brown sausage and onions in a skillet long enough to fry out fat but don’t cook until crisp. Drain off the fat. Cook noodles as directed on package and drain. Mix all ingredients together in a 10 by 10-inch greased casserole dish and bake at 325°F for 30 minutes. 

 

Lovina’s Amish Kitchen is written by Lovina Eicher, Old Order Amish writer, cook, wife, and mother of eight. Her two cookbooks, The Essential Amish Cookbook and Amish Family Recipes, are available wherever books are sold. Readers can write to Eicher at Lovina’s Amish Kitchen, PO Box 234, Sturgis, MI 49091 (please include a self-addressed stamped envelope for a reply); or email [email protected] and your message will be passed on to her to read. She does not personally respond to emails.