I sort of hate to admit it, but we often watch Wheel of Fortune in the evening; I guess I can justify it as preparing ourselves for the inevitable nursing / retirement home life. Anyway, I always scoff at the conversation between the host and the contestant who wins nothing but the $1000 the show automatically gives them. The host approaches them with outstretched hand and says something like “Well the Wheel just didn’t cooperate tonight; hope you had a good time.” Without fail, the contestant always blurts “Thanks, I had a ball!”… In what universe do I believe that? You know they’re thinking more like “Thanks for nothin,’ but this stinks! I played like this was my first day, I made a giant fool of myself and was humiliated in front of a gazillion TV viewers, and all for a measly thousand bucks you were gonna’ give me anyway!

That sorta’ sums up how I’m feeling about this year’s deer season so far. I thank God every time I’m in the woods for everything He shows me and for all the wonders of His creation He’s shown me over the years, but after hunting long and hard and still not harvesting a deer, inside I feel like it kinda’ stinks. Most mornings I was treated to a show by one of the many hordes of blackbirds. Like the colored “stuff” inside one of the old lava lamps, they slowly and methodically poured themselves around over a field of milo stalks. Back and forth and up and down they would go, slowly swirling and twirling into shapes that often resembled tornadoes. I always wonder exactly what their purpose in life is. Maybe a new winter Olympic sport should be “Synchronized Blackbird Flying.” Anyway, when all was said and done, the blackbirds provided the only action most days.

Deer numbers appear to be down around my neck of the woods, and other hunters in the area have felt the same. Both the guy who hunts the adjoining property and myself noticed fewer deer on our cameras this year, yet the number of tracks seems to suggest otherwise. If the deer are there, as tracks seem to show, they are moving only at night for some reason. There have been other years when I have not harvested a deer, but at least we always saw deer on those years; it was just a matter of not being at the right place on the right time. This year there hasn’t been a right place or a right time. If deer numbers locally are in fact lower, I have to think the drought that’s plagued our area for the past three years has something to with that. Drought wreaks havoc in ways we don’t think about or even know. Water is the sustainer of life, and lack of fresh drinking water can cause young fawns to die and possibly even be aborted before birth. Diseases also result by forcing wildlife to drink stagnant and contaminated water. The lack of rainfall also equals a lack of sufficient cover in the spring to hide and protect young fawns and other wildlife from natural predators. I’m never sure how much stock to put into hunting by the moon signs, but the moon was full or very bright for much of the 12-day season. Also, as warm as it’s been, deer have not had to burn many calories, meaning they needed to browse less and might have moved mostly at night.

Well, I guess I’ve vented enough and I feel a little better now. When I was a kid, a question my deer hunting buddies and I always asked each other right after deer season was “Well, are you eating venison or bologna?” (meaning, did you get your deer or not) This year I’ll be eatin’ bologna. I guess on the bright side, it will give me a chance to test some more recipes for my new cook book “The Unsuccessful

Deer Hunter’s Guide to Using Bologna,” coming soon to a sporting goods store near you. Continue to Explore Kansas Outdoors!

Steve can be contacted by email at [email protected].