A major seed company wuz having its annual meeting. The company geneticists had their own specialized session. The production folks also had their own specialized session. And, the sales group likewise had s specialized session.

The company’s national sales manager wuz leading that group. He started by saying national seed sales had hit a new record, both in bushels and dollars. He then went through the quarterly and annual sales report. He listed total sales by district.

The final thing on his agenda wuz to award prizes to the best salespersons in the company. He stressed how highly the company valued its sales persons and how it took great efforts to value each one in a personalized, individualized, sensitive manner.

Finally, as he reached the point in the program to dole out the sales awards, the sales manager sadly told the group that the company has recently lost its longest tenured salesman.

Someone in the group asked the sales manager, “What did he have?”

The sales manager said, “Eastern Kansas, western Missouri, southwest Iowa, and southeast Nebraska.”

***

A young ranch hand wuz to get married the next Saturday. But all week, working in high humidity riding fence, repairing fence, repairing water gaps, and working newly-arrived cattle, he developed a heck of a saddle sore and its attendant rash.

So, one evening after he finally quit working, he drove to town to see what he might purchase to relieve his irritation before the big weekend. He stopped at a pharmacy and, a bit embarrassed, described his condition and asked the lady pharmacist if she could recommend some powder or salve to give him some relief and healing.

The lady pharmacist immediately said, “I think I have just the product you’re looking for,” and she headed down the aisle. “Walk this way,” she told the ranch hand.

He noticed as she walked ahead of her that she wuz very bowlegged. So, he replied, “I’ve been walking that way all week, ma’am. That’s why I need some powder or salve.”

***

A farmer with a teenage son and a teenage daughter wuz running himself ragged trying to provide for them and keep up with all their wants and needs. As a consequence, he found himself working so much that he had very little personal time with them.

That’s why one evening, the pair teamed up on his and complained about their lack of personal time with him.

That’s when he sat them down and matter-of-factly explained, ” If you wish to continue to live in the comfortable, care-free manner to which you’ve become accustomed, then you won’t complain about the hours I work to support you.”

That wuz the last complaint he heard from them.

***

Last week, I name-dropped on famous or semi-famous folks that I’d personally encountered during my life.

Well, I forgot one of the most famous and it wuzn’t a person at all. Here’s the deal:

It wuz Three Bars, one of first and most famous Thoroughbred sires to breed to Quarter Horse mares and produce racing Quarter Horses. You might say he broke an “equine racist barrier.”

I wuz privileged to see him at Walter Merrick’s 101 Ranch in Sayre, Okla. I wuz doing a freelance cover story on Mr. Merrick for the Oklahoma Farmer-Stockman. I got to see the AQHA Hall of Fame sire breed one of the last mares he covered. He wuz 28 years old, and arthritic, but he still had fire in his eyes and got his job done.

Three Bars was the sire of 29 AQHA Champions, 4 AQHA Supreme Champions, 317 Racing Register of Merit earners, and his foals earned more than $3 million on the racetrack.

Among his famous offspring were Mr. Bar None, Gay Bar King, Sugar Bars, Lightning Bar, Tonto Bars Gill, St. Bar, Steel Bars, and Bar Money. Others include Triple Chick, Alamitos Bar, Bar Depth, Royal Bar, Josie’s Bar, and Galobar. His grandson Doc Bart became one of the most influential sires of cutting horses.

Three Bars had a blind mare companion during his last years. They had adjoining stalls and stood neck to neck for most of their days.

***

I ain’t talked much about my garden or my new shop that’s still not completed. The garden has so far escaped any major weather damage. The radishes, lettuce, and spinach have flourished. The tomatoes, potatoes, and sweet corn are knee high and growing fast. I’m harvesting about a half-pint of peas daily. We’re eating onions, too. The green beans are about to start blooming.

I’m using the shop, but it’s not finished. Still need a little work on the outside, but we’ve barely gotten started on the inside — except about all the materials are on site and ready to use.

I finally got music in the shop, so it’s one-step closer to a man-cave.

***

All of us old geezers at our daily gabfest and gossip group are retired. We talk about every subject under the sun and about the events and people in our lives.

It’s commonplace that when one of us gets up to leave the gabfest to go home he tells the group, “Okay, you can start talking about me now.”

Recently, one of our group turned the tables on us. He told us, “I’ve decided it’s a good thing when you all talk about me. That means you’re leaving everyone else alone!”

***

One morning this week, I told the group, “I’d better head home to do some morning work now, before I get so tired not doing any work that I won’t have the energy for afternoon work.”

“Huh?” they replied.

My comment is close enuf to words wisdom that it’ll have to suffice for this week.

Have a good ‘un.

Recently I wuz browsing the internet when I came across a discussion group which had a theme, “The Most Famous Person You’ve Ever Met.” Folks in the group name dropped a wide range of people they personally considered “famous.”
That got me to thinking. During my 82 years — after living in many places, after traveling to many places, and after many career experiences as a columnist and ag journalist — I’ve met quite a few folks that probably carried the “famous” or semi-famous label.

So, for this column, I’m gonna become a member of the Name Dropper Club. Some readers might consider it bragging, but it ain’t. It just happened. Here are some of the so-called “famous” persons that I’ve personally interacted with, not just seen from a distance.

Country Music & Humorists

• Willie Nelson — interviewed him prior to a Farm Aid Concert in Ames, Iowa. Very humble and down-to-Earth guy.

• Roy Clark — hunted with him in a celebrity quail hunt. Very friendly guy and a good shot. But he didn’t help clean the birds. His side-kick Vernon Sandusky hunted, too.

• Jerry Clower — aggie humorist, sat next to him at the head table at convention in Wichita. Could hardly get him to engage in conversation. Aloof. I think a phony nice guy.

• Baxter Black — close friend with Bax. Visited him at his ranch in Benson, Ariz., and posed with him for a picture in a brand new red two-holer privy he’d build. Genuine, all-around nice guy.

• D. B. Shepherd — country music singer, played rummy with him and “The Afternoon Bozo” in Shepherd’s tour bus at the Bates County Fair in Butler, Mo.

• Dale Summers — “The Afternoon Bozo” radio personality at 61 Country Radio in Kansas City in the 1970s-80s. We carried an ongoing, irregular give and take on his show.

•Shelly West — C/W female singer, visited with her during the National Farmers Organization convention in Oklahoma City.

• Janie Fricke — C/W female singer, hired her for farm show exhibitors’ party in Pittsburg, Kan. She choked on a moth while singing from the back of flatbed truck.

• Kenny Price — C/W singer and Hee Haw TV show regular, played game of 8-ball pool with him at Silver Saddle Supper Club in Parsons, Kan.

• Barbara Fairchild — C/W female singer, talked with her at the Silver Saddle Supper Club prior to her singing.

• Tracy Bird — visited him after he finished entertaining for candidate George W. Bush during a Republican presidential straw poll event in Ames, Iowa. Met him again after he entertained years later at the Granada Theater in Emporia, Kansas.

Journalists & Educators

• Norman Borlaug — Nobel Peace Prize winning agronomist, interviewed him about his extraordinary wheat breeding program in Pullman, Wash.

• A. D. “Dad” Weber — renowned head of the Kansas State University Animal Sciences Department, portrait hangs in Saddle And Sirloin Club in Chicago, sat next to him and visited on an airplane trip from Chicago to Kansas City.

• Pat Buchanan — national syndicated columnist, presidential speech writer, and brief Republican candidate for president, visited with him about his campaign in a booth at a diner in Boone, Iowa.

• Rod Turnbull — acclaimed Kansas City Star Farm Editor, met with him many times at farm events. Extremely nice and true professional.

• Ward Sinclair — Washington Post Farm Editor, visited with him at a table in the National Press Club in Washington, D.C. We were attending the annual convention of the National Farm Editors’ Association.

Politicos, Administrators, Bureaucrats

• Kansas U.S. Senator Bob Dole — when he invited himself to the Four State Farm Show in Parsons, Kan.

• North Carolina U.S. Senator Sam Irwin — head of the Nixon Watergate investigation, visited with him in the western art exhibit at the Kansas Livestock Association convention in Wichita. Pleasant and down-to-Earth guy. Speaker at the event.

• U.S. Rep. Kiki de LaGarza — Democrat Texan, tried to visit with him at the National Press Club in Washington, D.C., but he was too inebriated to carry on a conversation.

• James A. McCain — president of Kansas State University.

• Robert Kamm — president of Oklahoma State University.

• Pete Williams — National Leader of 4-H Clubs, worked with him in Oklahoma before he went to Washington.

• Secretaries of Agriculture — at various meetings: John Block, Orville Freeman, Ann Veneman, Dan Glickman, Tom Vilsack, Bob Bergland, Earl Butz.

Ag Leaders

• Wayne Cryts, — farmer from Puxico, Mo., and a national leader of the American Agriculture Movement during the farm protests in the 1980s. Interviewed him several times.

• Devon Woodland, Steve Halloran, and Paul Olson — three presidents of the National Farmers Organization, worked with all three.

• Walter Merrick — Quarter Horse Hall of Fame member, QH breeder, owner and trainer, from Sayre, Okla., bred the first AQHA Futurity winner, wrote cover story and picture of him for the Oklahoma Farmer-Stockman.

• Frank LeRoux — former Commodity Credit Corporation administrator for the USDA during the Lyndon Johnson administration, prominent Walla Walla, Wash. farmer, business man and author, met him at his home to plan to achieve parity farm prices for farmers through the National Organization for Raw Materials.

Business Notables

• H. L. Hunt — wealthy oil man, father of Lamar Hunt, met him at the National 4-H Club Congress in Chicago. Told me he still took brown bag lunch to work office.

• Ms. Walgreen — one of the founders of Walgreen Drugs, also at the National 4-H Congress in Chicago. We talked briefly in the lobby.

• Warren Staley — former CEO of Cargill, sat next to him and talked during a college football game.

Others

• Debbie Barnes — former Miss America from Moran, Kansas, preceded her in school five years, father was a John Deere dealer, met her as Miss America in Chicago at National 4-H Club Congress. She was commencement speaker for a daughter’s high school graduation. My mother-in-law was her elementary school teacher.

• Jim “Catfish” Hunter, baseball Hall of Fame member and Farm Crisis of the 1980s advocate, shared the speakers platform and luncheon with him during a “Farm Save Rally,” at Elizabeth City State University, in North Carolina. Pleasant and engaging fellow.

***

Enuf name dropping. Words of wisdom for the week: “Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first and the lesson afterwards.” — Vernon Sanders Law.

Have a good ‘un.